no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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