You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Randomize
