no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
