i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
