It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
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