Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize