1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
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