after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
This is classic penis vs brain.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize
