Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
40s are totally the cure
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
