he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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