yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
