Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
he laminated a picture of his dick.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize