I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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