I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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