GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
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