I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
