it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
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