he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
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Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
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just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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