Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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