i jhust puked up my retainher.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
