just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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