I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize