Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
