I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
So apparently I’m into choking now
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
