I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
