I haven't been this sober since birth.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Randomize