I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
