I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
