oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
