Having a random hookup so left but love u
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
