yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Come on in and take your pants off
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