I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Randomize
