So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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