"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.