Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
