Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize