just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
