Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
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I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
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