This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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