dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
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I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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