wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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