marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Randomize