if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize