She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
This is classic penis vs brain.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Randomize
