road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
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