To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
foreskin is a definite game changer
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
