Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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