woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize