"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
