counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Randomize
