Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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